tep 12 and the Stoic Connection: Finding Purpose in Recovery

Welcome to the 12th Step! I trust you have started incorporating Step 11 into your daily sobriety routine. The journey has been long and full of challenges, but I hope there to have been equal parts of the joy of embarking on a new life. The Twelfth Step of Alcoholics Anonymous is crucial in the recovery journey. The step reads: “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

Believe it or not, the 12th Step was actually the first step in the creation of the Alcoholics Anonymous fellowship! If you are unfamiliar with the story, I will share a shortened version here.

Bill Wilson, newly sober following the principles of The Oxford Group, was traveling on business. His business dealings were a failure, and he stood in a hotel lobby staring into a bar full of jovial folks. Desperate to maintain sobriety, he turned from the bar and found a nearby church directory. He made several calls to find a drunk who was desperately in need of help and was finally put in touch with Henrietta Seiberling, who knew of such a drunk.

Through the Oxford Group, she had gotten to know Dr. Bob Smith and his wife Anne enough to know of Dr. Bob’s struggles with alcohol. Henrietta arranged for Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob to meet at her house on Mother’s Day in 1935. After several hours of conversation, they forged a connection that transcended their social and professional differences through their shared desperation and intuitive understanding of each other’s struggles.

Dr Bob was well versed in the treatment, or lack thereof, of alcoholism at the time, but it was Bill’s message, one drunk to another, that convinced the good doctor that Bill might be on to something. Soon, Bill and Dr Bob would be tracking down alcoholics in Akron and NYC, starting the journey to build what we know as Alcoholics Anonymous.

This simple act of one alcoholic reaching out to another, offering empathy and understanding instead of judgment, ignited a spark of hope in both men. That is where the importance of Step 12 lies. At its core, Step 12 is about transformation, service to others, and maintaining sobriety through living a life of purpose. This final step challenges individuals to give back what they have received and integrate the principles of AA into everyday life.

How to work Step 12 in AA

To effectively carry the message, we in recovery can engage in various activities, such as:

1) Sponsoring Others: A sponsor is a member who has experience working through the Twelve Steps and serves as a guide, mentor, and supporter to a newcomer or someone struggling in their recovery journey. This one-on-one interaction provides an opportunity to share experiences, offer advice, and hold the newcomer accountable for their sobriety.

2) Volunteering: Volunteering at AA meetings or other recovery-related organizations can provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment. There are many things and roles that one can volunteer for, from making coffee or cleaning up after a meeting to serving as a meeting chair or other AA service functions.

3)  Public Speaking: Sharing one’s story at public speaking events or conferences can help educate others about addiction and recovery. This can be a powerful way to inspire and motivate others to seek help. Although this may seem daunting, if one starts by sharing at meetings or telling one’s story at smaller meetings, we may really enjoy it and want to do more.

4) Small Gestures: Working the 12th step does not always mean significant actions. Welcoming a new member to a meeting and having a short conversation to make the person feel welcome can make as much of a difference as any other action. Offering people rides to meetings, our phone number to call anytime, or an encouraging word are small but meaningful 12th-step activities.

How does Stoicism relate to Step 12?

When viewed through the lens of Stoicism, the philosophical framework of self-control, virtue, and service aligns beautifully with the principles embodied in Step 12. Both traditions emphasize the importance of living in harmony with one’s values, helping others, and accepting life’s challenges with grace and wisdom.

The Spiritual Awakening: Transformation Through Practice
Bill Wilson, co-founder of AA, described the spiritual awakening as a profound inner change. In his words: “Most emphatically we wish to say that any alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to spiritual concepts. He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial.” A spiritual awakening is not necessarily religious but is a shift in perspective, values, and behaviors.

Stoicism echoes this transformation. Marcus Aurelius, a Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher, wrote in Meditations: “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” Stoicism involves recognizing the power of internal change, aligning one’s life with virtue, and living per nature’s flow. Similarly, the spiritual awakening in AA is about internal alignment and cultivating a mindset that sustains sobriety.

Carrying the Message: Service as a Path to Freedom
Step 12 emphasizes carrying the AA message to others. This act of service is both practical and deeply philosophical. Helping others not only spreads hope but also reinforces one’s own commitment to sobriety. As Bill Wilson wrote, “Practical experience shows that nothing will so much ensure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.”

In Stoicism, service to others is considered a cardinal virtue. Marcus Aurelius advised: “Men exist for the sake of one another. Teach them, then, or bear with them.” Helping others is an act of generosity and a duty inherent in our shared humanity. By assisting another person, we reaffirm our own values and strengthen our ability to live virtuously.

Anecdotes from AA members often highlight the transformative power of service. For example, a recovering alcoholic may share how sponsoring a newcomer revitalized their own commitment to the program. This mirrors Stoicism’s emphasis on the interconnectedness of individuals and the importance of mutual support.

Practicing Principles in All Affairs: Integration of Virtue
The latter part of Step 12 encourages members to live by AA’s principles in all aspects of life. This holistic approach to recovery ensures that sobriety is not confined to meetings but becomes a way of life.

In Stoic philosophy, the goal is to live in accordance with virtue. Epictetus emphasized this integration: “Don’t explain your philosophy. Embody it.” Stoics aim to internalize their principles so profoundly that they manifest naturally in every mundane or profound action.

For an AA member, this could mean demonstrating patience in a stressful situation, offering compassion to a struggling coworker, or taking responsibility for a mistake. These actions reflect the AA principle of humility and the Stoic virtue of temperance—self-restraint in thoughts and behaviors.

The Ripple Effect: Inspiring Others Through Example
Step 12 involves demonstrating the benefits of sobriety through one’s actions. Leading by example can inspire others to begin or recommit to their recovery journey. As the Big Book notes: “Our behavior will convince them more than our words.”

This parallels the Stoic idea of being a role model. Marcus Aurelius advised: “Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.” By embodying the principles of AA and Stoicism, individuals can become beacons of hope for others.

For instance, a recovering alcoholic who maintains composure during a crisis might inspire a newcomer to strive for similar resilience. This subtle but profound influence demonstrates that change is possible and transformative.

Conclusion

The Twelfth Step of Alcoholics Anonymous is a powerful tool for maintaining sobriety and helping others. By sharing our experiences, strength, and hope, we in recovery can inspire and guide those still struggling. This service act benefits others and reinforces our commitment to a sober and fulfilling life.

Step 12 of Alcoholics Anonymous is a profound call to action—to serve others, live by principle, and integrate the lessons of recovery into daily life. When combined with the timeless wisdom of Stoicism, this step becomes not just a path to maintaining sobriety but a framework for living a virtuous and meaningful life.

Through service, resilience, and self-reflection, individuals can find purpose and fulfillment while inspiring others to embark on their journeys of transformation. As both AA and Stoicism teach, true strength lies in embracing life as it is and striving to be of service to the greater good.

Resources

Step 12 Chapter in Twelve Steps and 12 Traditions – PDF Version

12 Step Talk by Father Martin (I love Father Martin!)